im gay
i know
yea but for you.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
