Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize