Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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