is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
