i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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