i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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