I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
