Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
FUCK WHALES
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
