if i can run in heels then i can drive
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize