We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
