her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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