he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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