There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
