Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
