I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I have post one night stand depression
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
