there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
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I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
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We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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