I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
ugly people sure do ruin things
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
