Rock
Scissors
Fuck
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
