Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
