i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
