you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I want her autograph on my taint
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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