Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I could fuck to npr.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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