This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
