Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize