Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Sext me about skeletons
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize