literally had 100 drinks last night.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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