never play flip cup with pint glasses
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
as a side note pls kill me
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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