So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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