1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
