and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
