are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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