The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
