At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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