i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
