I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
