I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Two words: nipple clamps
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
