I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
you made out with another girl for some wings
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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