Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
