Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
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