Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
there was a trapeze. enough said
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Maybe he injected his testicle?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
