If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I FOUND THE LEGS
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
