soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
