I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize