How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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