I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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