So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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