I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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