you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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