all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
