I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
its not stalking. its research.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
my being single is dangerous.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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