To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
we're making bets on your personal life
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
