everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize